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Welcome to the December issue of our Helping Parents Heal Newsletter!  Hello!  We are glad you have found us.  This newsletter is a space that allows us to share our amazing children. We are all in this together.  We understand and we walk the same path. Thank you for your compassion and for the constant support you provide.  Together, we will help each other heal! 

If you have not done so, take a look at our beautiful new website: www.helpingparentsheal.org.  It is a wonderful tool to share our affiliate chapters, recommended books, providers, links and videos as well as our favorite causes. There is also a new page for 'Daily Tributes' to celebrate our children's' birthdays and Angel Dates.  This is a private page and the password is Everest.  Please take a moment to enter your child's name, dates, information and photo.  Each child will automatically appear twice a year with his or her tribute, photo and information.  This is a permanent and wonderful way to remember our children!  

Please join us for our second Helping Parents Heal Online Meeting November 27th with special guest speaker Evidential Medium Suzanne Giesemann!  Diane Romagnoli and Rachel Pearson will be organizing meetings with parents throughout the US and the world through Zoom Video Conferencing.  Space is limited to 50 participants -you can RSVP here.  

For those of you who live in the Phoenix area, we have a wonderful upcoming meeting schedule! We have many talented speakers who have graciously agreed to give their time and energy to our group:  Nita Lapinski, the author of 'Habits that Heal' on November 20th,  The Carefree Medium Susanne Wilson on December 18th and Roberta Grimes, attorney, author and afterlife expert, on January 15th.  Please be sure to RSVP for these events as seating is limited! Hope to see you there.

First Annual Helping Parents Heal Conference April 2018
As many of you know, Helping Parents Heal (a 501C3 corporation) plans to hold its first annual conference in Scottsdale, Arizona April 13-15th, 2018.  We are thrilled about the many talented presenters who have agreed to speak as well as the 100+ parents who have already said they would join us for this joyful event.  Irene Vouvalides and Tracy Venters, our Hilton Head and Dallas affiliate leaders, are hard at work coordinating the conference. Please click here to be transferred to the fundraising site.  

Sending love and light to each one of you and to your beautiful children.  You are not alone.

-Elizabeth Boisson, Co-Founder and President of Helping Parents Heal, Newsletter Editor and Affiliate Leader for Phoenix/Scottsdale.

When A Loved One Crosses Over - A Mindful Meditation

Hello, beautiful Parents!

A friend of mine, Teri Simonds Snyder, just shared this beautiful mindful meditation that her friend Jen Ward wrote. I know that by using it you will feel even closer to your children:

When Someone Crosses Over

When someone crosses over, they really don't go anywhere. They slip off the vibration of their physical skin and are still present in more subtle vibrations. There are Universes encapsulated in each moment and without the coarse vibration of the physicality, loved ones who cross over are free to experience the beauty of subtle realms.

But they aren't lost to you. They just don't have the coarse senses any more to communicate with you. It is up to you to hone your subtle senses so tat you can communicate with them. It doesn't have to be mysterious or creepy. It can be as sweet and beautiful as sensing them in the subtle breeze, hearing their pet phrase fall from the lips of another or hear a sweet song that always reminded you of them.

The belief that they are lost to you forever is what loses you to them. Crossing doesn't have to be so drastic and harsh.Those whose loved ones stay in tuned with them after they have crossed and are loving and supportive are the ones that feel like they have won the lottery. It is literally the best of both worlds.

What causes the separation is the emotional devastation that some get entrenched in. It creates a schism in the relationship and interferes wit the connection. The opposite is true. Well wishes and intentions create a healthy relationship across the border of this world and the next.

"I accept _______'s crossing in all moments"
"I release using _______'s passing to get attention; in all moments"
"I release creating drama around ________'s crossing; in all moments"
"I release shutting down to _______'s love; in all moments" 
"I release associating _________ with sadness instead of love; in all moments"
"I remove all the trauma and engrams of _________'s crossing; in all moments"
"I dry up all the drama and negativity others try to put on ________'s crossing; in all moments"
"I dissipate all ignorance in regards to ________'s crossing; in all moments"
"I heal all in wound and between myself and ________; in all moments
"I accept __________'s love in every form; in all moments"
"I release saddling ___________ with grief in all moments
"I release disconnecting from ________ because they have passed"
"I release withdrawing my love from ________in all moments"
"I shift my paradigm from sadness to gratitude; in all moments"
"I send love, enthusiasm and gratitude to _________ in all moments"
"I release all the grief that creates a separation between myself and __________; in all moments"
"I am centered and empowered in divine love for ________; in all moments" 
"I resonate, emanate and am interconnected with __________ in divine love; in all moments"

I hope that this also resonates with each of you!

~Love and light to you and your beautiful children 
Lucy Hone and her beautiful daughter Abi

When Happiness Has A Bad Day-Dr. Lucy Hone NTSC

Dr. Lucy Hone, a researcher in resilience/well-being at the Auckland University of Technology in New Zealand, explains her own experience with the passing of her beautiful daughter Abi in a car accident and the 5 helpful steps she has used to move forward and heal.  Thank you, Irene Vouvalides, for introducing me to Lucy!  Please watch Lucy's Youtube video here.  

Dr. Mark Pitstick and his book 'SoulProof'

Evolved Souls Don’t Need Long Earthly Lives
December 2016

by Mark Pitstick, MA, DC 

Welcome!  I recommend reading the Foundational Articles for Healing and Transforming at the lower left of www.soulproof.com.  Listen to the free radio shows with top experts and our answers to life’s toughest questions including why children die.  The website www.drgaryschwartz.com shares scientific research indicating that the consciousness/soul does not end after physical death.  www.eternea.org is an excellent source of evidence that life and love are eternal.  Let me know if you need a product, but cannot afford it, and we will send you a digital copy at no charge.

This month’s questions, as always, are difficult so I’ll share my condolences up front.  I am very sorry you have experienced all the pain, sadness and other emotions that occur when your child transitions.  It is very tough, no doubt about it.  No one could blame you if you stayed stuck in depression and imbalance for the rest of your life. 
 
However, it’s clear that:
1. Your children are alive and well in another phase of forever.
2. They are very happy and peaceful and want you to be that way too.
3. You will see each other again and can enjoy an ongoing relationship now.
4. You can have a grief-induced spiritually transformative experience that will improve your life and that of many others around you.
5. You can give more meaning to your child’s passing by serving others and converting your pain into love.  Many parents have done this and you can too! 
 
Q: It's been 3 months, 20 days since my daughter left me. Every day I miss her dearly and wish she was still here. Some days are all right and some like today, I'm at my worst.  Can this pain get and stay better? – Lolly

A: Yes it can, Lolly, but usually not at this stage.  You are just starting the journey from deep grief to acceptance and peace.  It’s impressive that you are already having some “all right” days.  That suggests you are very strong and there’s a good prognosis that you will get through this.  For now, take time to read and follow recommendations in articles #2 and 6.  Take care of yourself using steps from article #12.  Be patient and gentle with yourself – you are doing great! 
 
Q: I think I have hit the anger stage. I'm angry at the world. I have been so short with my coworkers and feel like they don't care. I'm angry at my daughter for stressing me out. I'm angry at my mom for not supporting or helping me. I hate my job and this life that I now have to live!! I want my life back!! I want my son back! – Sandy

A: Yes, it sounds as though you are in the anger stage, Sandy.  And that’s a good thing!  You have every right to be angry so let it out.  Don’t feel guilty about it, but do act appropriately toward others.  Realize that it’s your process, not theirs.  They probably feel your pain, but don’t know what to do.

I would definitely get hold of the Transformational Breath Work CD/digital audio and use it three times a week until you are improved.  Then decrease to twice per week and less as you begin to have less anger.  Let your self cry, scream, pound the bed, and massage muscles that feel tight and are holding stuck emotions.  Work and flow through the stages.  You deserve to feel happy again and the world is just waiting for your light to shine once more. 
 
Q: Thank you so much for your messages.  They have been a great help to me in the passing of our son two years after he took an overdose of depression meds and left us without warning. He was only 32 years old.  During his funeral service, my neighbor said he saw a grey mist raise up from my son's body.  Was this mist my son's spirit leaving his body?  If so, why did his spirit leave so long after the body had died?  - Mary
 
A: When souls pass on, they often linger a bit to make sure their loved ones are OK.  They send messages of peace and comfort that may or may not be received.  His soul wasn't attached to the body until the funeral.  It was hovering above, watching, and – most of all – reminding you and your family about #1-3 in the intro above.  He is sorry for dying, but just couldn't take it anymore.
 
Your neighbors perception was filtered by his beliefs and abilities to accurately sense nonphysical reality.  The gray mist wasn't your son's soul, it was just your neighbor’s perception of it.  If you haven't already, visit the soulproof.com website and read the articles, especially #1, 2, 4, 6, 9, and 25.  (I don't know if his overdose was accidental or on purpose so #4 may or may not be relevant.)
 
The Ask Your Soul technique allows you to get very relaxed and access your inner wisdom.  That will help you remember why this happened and how you can best go on.  Take those steps and let me know how it's going in 30 days, please.  

Q : Oh my, just wondering how or if I'm going to be able to handle Randall's birthday on December 16th and Christmas.  Just thinking about it breaks my heart.  I don’t know how I will actually make it through the month of December. – Sandra

A: The best way to get through it, Sandra, is also a great way to live in general: one day at a time.  If you focus on the next six weeks, it will feel overwhelming.  But you can do it if you chunk it down.  Prepare ahead so you’re around supportive and understanding family and friends.  Take extra time for prayer, meditation, walking, serving others, and other practices that will help.  December will be an important time to reach out and lean on others.  Later, when you’re stronger, you can do the same for others who are in need.  Please let us know how you did and what worked for you so we can share that with others. 

Q: My son died in 2013 due to a careless doctor.  He was/is a loving, compassionate 40 year old who was loved by many.  It is very hard to live without him.  He has come to me a few times, full of practical jokes and love.  We were never able to get any justice for him because of the underhandedness of the doctor and the hospital.  How do you carry on??  I sometimes get so angry at God Himself.  Anything you can suggest? - Marlene
 
A: Your anger and other feelings are completely understandable.  However, your son's essence is now in a dimension where love, peace, joy, gratitude, and enthusiasm predominate.  What appeared, from an earthly perspective, to be just horrible medical malpractice was also his ticket back Home.  Souls move on in a timely manner even though it may appear to be a senseless tragedy to us.  
 
It's great that you have had some visits from him.  He is giving you a hint about how to handle all this.  He isn't angry and hopeless about what happened.  He is – as you say –full of love and laughter.  How do you move in that direction?  Start with something small: a smile instead of a frown, watch some classic comedies, be around children and pets, serve those in need and feel your heart swell with love. 

Use the Ask Your Soul technique so you can gain greater insight about why things turned out as they did.  Ditto for Transformational Breathwork.  If you're not already, provide service to others in your son's memory.  Follow the holistic health practices described in article #12 to tune-up your body, mind, and spirit.  Put those steps to work and let us know how you're doing in 90 days.  

Note: This information is not designed to replace medical or psychological care.  Dr. Pitstick’s recommendations are based on his forty-four years of training and experience in hospitals, pastoral counseling settings, mental health centers, and private practice. 
 
Mark Pitstick, MA, DC is an author, master’s clinical psychologist, holistic chiropractic physician, frequent media guest, and workshop facilitator. He can help you know and show that—no matter what is going on around you and although it certainly may not seem like it—your earth-experience is a totally safe, meaningful, and magnificent adventure amidst forever. Visit www.soulproof.com for free articles, newsletters, and radio shows with top consciousness experts.  Email your toughest questions about life, death, and afterlife to him at mark@soulproof.com.

-Dr. Mark Pitstick is a Board Member of Helping Parents Heal and of Eternea

Fellowship and Coincidences by Ernie and Kristine Jackson
Kristine and Ernie

The voicemail message

Not too long ago I was conversing with a co-worker on the phone; she works out of our Sacramento office.  Somehow we ended up talking about work/life balance in reference to our boss.  Our boss has a family, most notably a 9-year old son.  While on the job I don’t often share, but since I knew I was about to make another leap, I decided to share part of our journey.

I shared how I learned the awful lesson that tomorrow is not promised.  Typical of when I share (and maybe when you share too) she shared that she had learned the same lesson after having a miscarriage many years ago and with the transition of her beloved husband in 2008.  Usually when someone shares the loss of a loved one, at some point in our conversation I ask if they have received any signs from their transitioned loved one.  This conversation was no different.  I soon asked the question and the answer filled me with awe and love.

This woman shared with me that sometime after her husband transitioned; she received a voice mail message. When she listened to the message, it was filled with static, but embedded in the static there was a voice.  And that voice, her husband’s voice, quite clearly said, “I’m okay.”  This woman was amazed and a little skeptical, so she let those she trusted listen to the voice mail too.  They also heard her transitioned husband say to his wife, from the other side – that he was okay!

How amazing is that?  I have read about such occurrences, but I don’t think I have every spoken with someone who has had such a wonderful experience.  This divine and awful dichotomy; losing a loved one while at the same time being shown that our loved ones still exist!  Helping Parents Heal celebrates these events as our mission statement clearly indicates:

Our Mission: Helping Parents Heal is a non-profit organization dedicated to assisting parents who have lost children, giving them support and resources to aid in the healing process. We go a step beyond other groups by allowing the open discussion of spiritual experiences and evidence for the afterlife, in a non-dogmatic way. Affiliate groups are expected to welcome everyone regardless of religious (or non-religious) background and allow for open dialog.

I just love hearing about how our loved ones make contact from the other side.  Our first and second books share and celebrate these magical occurrences.  I would be honored if you might share how your loved ones have made contact.  Please send your validations to me at ernie@quintonsmessages.com – Who knows, maybe Helping Parents Heal will publish a book sharing all of these glorious visits.

Many Blessings!

-Ernie and Kristine Jackson

-Ernie Jackson is a Board Member of Helping Parents Heal and the proud father of Quinton.  His two books,'Quinton's Messages' and 'Quinton's Legacy', are available at www.quintonsmessages.com. Please also view Ernie and Kristine's video of their June 2015 presentation at the Phoenix/Scottsdale Chapter of Helping Parents Heal here.

Affiliate Updates - 

Helping Parents Heal - Cave Creek!
The Sanna Family - Tyler, TJ, Carol and Tony

Hello my name is Tony Allen.  My son Tyler transitioned to heaven on May 14, 2016.  Tyler and I enjoyed so many of the same things together; mountain bike riding, camping, hiking and riding our Harleys.  I miss him every single day and have really struggled. 

My wife Carol has been hosting a Helping Parents Heal meeting monthly at our home.  She insisted that I attend this meeting since I have missed them all. During the meeting, one of the moms who attended, Laurie Savoie, who is a medium and a fellow bereaved parent, was speaking and mentioned a girl from the spirit world who had popped up. Laurie recognized her because she had seen her on the cover of People magazine.  Something made me ask her who this girl was, she said she was one of the children who died in the Sandy Hook tragedy. 

I immediately knew this was Tyler's message to me.  Tyler had a essay due in  high school and decided to write about Sandy Hook, he and I discussed it in great detail. Tyler had so much love and compassion and was devastated over the Sandy Hook incident.  Laurie had mentioned that she almost did not come that evening because it had been raining hard however felt compelled to come because Tyler kept appearing and asking her if she would be there. 

I know Tyler was happy that I was at the meeting and wanted me to know that he was with the girl who had passed.  This has helped comfort me, I know Tyler is always around me.

-Written by Tyler's Proud Dad, Tony Allen
Tyler Allen, Morgan Boisson, Andy Hull, Quinton Jackson, Bodhe Farkas & Garrett Savoie

We had a wonderful, healing meeting of Helping Parents Heal - Cave Creek at our November 3rd meeting at Carol Allen's home.

The validations that were sent by our kids were amazing. They work so hard to let us know that they are okay and that they want us to be happy! Thank you, Carol and Tony, for your warm welcome and thank you, kids, for showing up! You are so loved.

Helping Parents Heal - Hilton Head!
Tony and Irene Vouvalides with Suzanne and Ty Giesemann

Greetings everyone from South Carolina! It was a very interesting October here, we survived Hurricane Matthew with no damage to our home or property. Actually all of my friends here in Moss Creek had some fallen trees on their properties, no-one had structural damage. I have told everyone our angels couldn't stop the storm but they could minimize destruction for us. I have to admit I don't think I would stay if another Cat 2 hurricane comes again, Linus and I spent two scary hours in my closet!

We had a great meeting (delayed one week because of hurricane) with guest speaker Medium Jake Samoyedny, it was very uplifting and healing. While Jake was here in SC some members had meaningful messages from loved ones in the Afterlife. 

We are excited to have Suzanne Giesemann as our guest speaker In January as well as attending her workshop here in Hilton Head the day before our meeting. ( January 7 and 8)
Suzanne and Ty stopped in Hilton Head on their way home to Florida and Tony and I got to spend some wonderful time with them. We drove them through Sea Pines Plantation which sustained the most damage due to Matthew. It is absolutely  amazing to see the power and destruction nature can produce. We had a wonderful dinner with them at Ela's restaurant on island Monday night, one of our favorite restaurants here. Suzanne relayed to me that she felt Carly's presence in the restaurant with us, just an amazing evening!

Sending love to everyone!
XOXO

-Written by Carly's Mom and our Hilton Head Affiliate Leader, Irene Vouvalides.

Irene has a wonderful schedule of upcoming speakers; in January 2017, Evidential Medium and Messenger of Hope Suzanne Giesemann and in May 2017 intuitive and bereaved mom and blogger Sara Ruble.  Irene holds her meetings on the second Sunday of every month from 1-4 pm in the Seaquins Ballroom, 1300 Fording Island Road, Bluffton SC.  

While Suzanne Giesemann is in Bluffton, she will be offering a workshop on January 7th from 9 am - 4:30 pm.  You can learn more and sign up here!

Please view Irene's wonderful interview on WSAV TV about Carly's Kids and Helping Parents Heal here.

Helping Parents Heal - Fort Lauderdale!
My Healing Journey with The Monroe Institute-Ana Fernandez

On January 21, 2011, my life shattered. My youngest son Bradford, at age 14, committed suicide. Everything I knew regarding the AfterLife came into question. Amnesia set in, as a result of the indescribable pain, guilt and endless, unanswered, questions vibrating through every cell in my body.  Surviving moment by moment became a way of life, much the same way a terminally-ill patient survives each day. Lost in despair, I asked myself “How do I exist without my son?” My soul felt empty as I dived into an endless abyss.

With the support of loving family, friends, and Divine strength, I gathered whatever courage left in me and focused on re-programming my belief system. Daily I reminded myself that my son was alive, as love transcends the grave. I continued to search for new ways to connect with Bradford and learn new methods to calm my mind.  During this process, The Monroe Institute became a key component in my healing. 

In 2014 I attended their foundation program Gateway. Bradford made his presence known from the first day at the Institute. Through the use of the Hemi-Sync exercises, the heartfelt support of the participants in my group and the guidance of the trainers, I began to slowly work on releasing my guilt and fear that consumed my entire being due to Bradford’s physical absence.  I learned to suspend my grief enough to quiet my emotions and connect with Bradford from an awareness level that is beyond my conscious state. In that process, I experienced myself as the eternal being that I am. Robert Monroe’s classic affirmation “I am more than my physical body. Because I am more than physical matter, I can perceive that which is greater than the physical body” became my daily mantra. 

Since Gateway, I participated in MC2, and recently completed Guidelines. Throughout  each program, Bradford was present. I have been able to experience my son’s presence from a heightened awareness, looking at the event from a new perspective. With each program I attended, additional layers of suffering, pain, fear, guilt, and intense emotions were released. I learned to travel amongst both worlds, the physical and the spirit world, by expanding my consciousness, understanding that physical death is a portal to our true home.  I became emotionally stronger, eliminating any need for years of therapy. The illusion of separateness melted away.

As grieving parents our journey is heavy, sometimes paralyzing. However, as we acquire new tools and deepen our spiritual knowledge, we can work through our grief by reinforcing the knowing that our child is alive and well, accompanying us in every step we take. As I’ve learned to expand my consciousness and experience deeper connections, hope re-awakened, life became livable and I now smile at the beauty that surrounds me, while savoring the sweetness of knowing that I will be reunited with my Bradford when my ticket is called and I sail back home. 

Miracles are common occurrences at The Monroe Institute. I am one of them.

-Ana Fernandez, Monroe Institute Graduate and Fort Lauderdale Affiliate Leader

Helping Parents Heal - Cincinnati!
Shayna and her Dad, Brian Smith

Helping Parents Heal - Fourth Meeting

We recently had our fourth Helping Parents Heal meeting.  We had two couples in attendance and a single mother. One of the couples is a couple Tywana has known for several months from a grief support group that we attended.  The wife is a counselor in that group. We invited them so the husband could share his experience with Induced After Death Communications (IADC) done by Allan Botkin.  Interestingly, the two couples in attendance both are counselors for other grief groups- one for grieving parents and the other a general grief support group. 

Once again, with a pretty small group and given that five of the seven of us there have already shared our stories, I wonder if we’ll have enough to talk about to fill the two hours that are allotted,  But, the conversation just seems to flow very naturally.  We talk about the signs we have gotten. We share information on good local mediums.  One couple has never been to a medium.  The rest of us have. We share information on Podcasts and books. And, we hear about the experience of IADC facilitated by EMDR (rapid eye movement).  Once again, the meeting doesn’t bring the people I was expecting. We had a radio interview in October and this was our first meeting since then. The hope was that maybe some grieving parents who need support would show up.  No one has responded to that interview. Tywana and I are getting a lot out of the group though just sharing stories.  We don’t know how often or for how long the people who already involved with other groups will come back.  They seem to enjoy it though. In other groups talk about signs can be discouraged because they want to be sensitive to people who haven’t gotten signs.  Talking about mediums in groups that meet in some churches can be taboo.  Nothing is taboo in our group.  So, we hope they’ll find that conversation valuable.  

-Written by Brian Smith, Co-Affiliate Leader with his wife, Tywana Smith, of HPH Cincinnati.  Please read more of Brian's blog 'Beautiful Light' here.   Tywana and Brian had a wonderful interview with Tara Robinson-please listen here. 

Helping Parents Heal-Phoenix/Scottsdale! 
Linda Moser (Center with black sweater) and some of the parents who attended

We spent a wonderful afternoon with Linda Moser of TrumpetVine Healing for our October Phoenix/Scottsdale Affiliate group meeting. Linda led us through a Guided Meditation with song and then helped us to better understand some of the wonderful healing techniques that she offers, including massage therapy, Reiki, Tonal therapy, Lomi Lomi, Herbology, Psychic Energy Trigger Points, Cranial Sacral Therapy and she specializes in Heart Awakening Therapy.

Thank you for all of those who came and a special thanks to Linda for coming to speak! Also, congratulations to Mary Sutton and Lynn Harper-winners of scholarships to attend David Router's three-day workshop at Storm Wisdom! Thank you, Lilla Swanson for so kindly raffling them off.

Love and light to all of you and to your beautiful children!

-Elizabeth Boisson

Sheri’s Corner-
Wisdom and Quotes from The East Coast

Sheri’s Corner - Wisdom and Quotes from the East Coast
 
“Keep in mind that faith does not imply certainty. On the contrary, faith implies a leap of trust into that which you cannot see, for if what we were talking about were seeable and self-evident, we would not need faith."

-Sheri Perl from her book: Lost and Found---A Mother Connects-Up With Her Son In Spirit

You do not need to have complete certainty in order to explore the spirit realm and make connections with your child. Most people, especially if they are new to exploring the afterlife, will have some doubts and that’s okay. All that is required is a mind that is open, so that you can begin to make your own exploration. Once you do, the evidence will come and your doubts will weaken. What’s needed is your willingness to take a small leap of faith and simply begin the exploration. To me, that leap of faith implies hope, not certainty. So, don’t get down on yourself if a voice in your head surfaces and raises doubts. We don’t need certainty, just hope and an adventurers spirit. 

-Written by our NYC Affiliate Leader, Sheri Perl Migdol

Please visit Sheri's Prayer Registry here. She will hold a meeting of the Helping Parents Heal - NYC affiliate on December 4th at 4:00 pm.  Please RSVP and learn more here.  

Mission Statement of Helping Parents Heal: Our mission is to help bereaved parents, giving them support and resources to aid in the healing process. We will go a step beyond other groups by allowing the open discussion of spiritual experiences and evidence for the Afterlife in a non-dogmatic way. In other words, we will welcome everyone regardless of their religious (or non-religious) background and allow for a very open type of dialog. We receive all and do not judge people or their children on the basis of life choices. -Mark Ireland, Cofounder, Helping Parents Heal