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A new project from comedian Chris Garcia...that might sound familiar. 
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This week, we have something special for you. 

Comedian Chris Garcia has been working with our colleagues at WNYC Studios to tell the story about his family's history in Cuba. It's a history he can no longer ask his dad about, because Chris's dad died from Alzheimer's in 2017.

Last year, we shared a pilot episode with you of a show that Chris was making about processing his grief with other people, including his mother and other comedians. In our feed, that episode was called Alzheimer's and the World's Saddest Comedy Club. We asked you to fill out a survey afterward to tell us what you thought about the pilot, and you had really moving responses. Many of you wrote about how it made you think about loved ones you've lost. Others of you appreciated some of the humor in the face of grief, and some just loved hearing the stretches of Spanish between Chris and his mother. 

So that brings us to today's launch of Chris's new podcast series, Scattered, that is based on that pilot. We're sharing episode two in our podcast feed today. 

Enjoy! And thank you for being a part of helping new stories and shows get made here at WNYC Studios. 

Anna and the Death, Sex & Money team
This Week on Death, Sex & Money
There are a lot of things we don't know about our parents. In the new podcast Scattered, comedian Chris Garcia is on a mission to find answers to the lingering questions he still has about his dad following his death.

In episode two, which you can hear in our feed right now, Chris begins to unpack what his dad's life in Cuba was like⁠—including the time he spent in Castro's labor camps. "They wanted to debilitate us. They did so much physical and psychological damage to us, and they never stopped. It was inconceivable," a survivor of the camps tells Chris. "They ruined our lives completely."

Don't miss this series—and if you haven't heard episode one, make sure you go back and listen to that too!
Anna, Live in SF—Tomorrow!
Hey San Francisco! Got plans on Thursday? You do now! Come hear Anna interview writer Anne Lamott live on stage as part of the Reimagine End of Life festival. They'll talk together about death, yes, but also about how Anne got married earlier this year at 65 years old (BTW, if you haven't read it already, check out her truly excellent Vows column). There are still tickets available—hope to see you there! 
Your Stories: Race & Friendships
Right now, we're asking you to tell us about the specific moments in your lives when race has been a flashpoint in a friendship. And so far, you've sent us really interesting stories—like this one, from a listener who wanted to go by Stan, who's feeling strain with one of his friends: 
"At a certain point, he just didn't seem to understand the privilege that he had. And it got to the point where I just kind of refused to be friends with him. I pulled away and decided that I would go see the big blockbuster movies with him, but when it came to investing in his friendship, that wasn't something I could do anymore if he couldn't check his own privilege. Because by not checking his own privilege, I didn't feel like he saw who I was.

At a certain point, he kept inviting me to hang out, and I kept resisting. And it finally came to the point where it bugged him so much that I went and hung out with him. At that point he apologized, and I am happy to say that even though we have not gotten to the final destination, things have gotten a lot better.

He had a son and he asked me to be his son's godfather, and when he did that he told me that it was because he felt like there were so many things that he needed to teach his son that he didn't know how to. He needed my help. On the one hand, I felt really honored to hear him say that. And then on the other hand I felt like, wow, I'm teaching YOU and now your next generation. That seems like another burden to bear. It's a complexity I haven't yet figured out how to navigate."

 
—Stan*, 31, DC
*Name changed
We also heard from Mia, a white listener in California who's trying to check her privilege around her friends...but worries that what she's doing still isn't enough.
"I pride myself on having a diverse range of friends. Not just the one friend of color, but multiple groups of friends from all backgrounds, both racially and economically. This has been the ONLY way for me to address my own biases and racist behaviors.  
 
I am included at times in conversations about white people (which I consider myself to be) and the beliefs, actions, and systems that negatively impact my closest friends. I am always aware that my place within these conversations is to simply listen. No matter how I feel about what is said, I listen. I don't debate. I don't disagree. I just listen.
 
While I feel honored that my friends trust me enough to speak honestly in front of me about my own racial group, I do wonder at times if I am a fraud and they will find out and we will no longer be friends. I worry that perhaps I am not as open as I think I am. I wonder if I am just pretending to be an ally but maybe I don't do enough or don't say enough, specifically to my own family members when they say problematic things. I wonder if just being close friends with people of color is enough to actually change race relations in this country.
 
This anxiety is constantly with me. I worry
as I grow older, will I simply be comfortable with my problematic thoughts or behaviors that still exist? Will I end up living in a mostly white community since it is 'comfortable'? Will I loose the part of me that has taken an interest in race relations in this county since I was in junior high school? Will I no longer value these friendships? Will it be easier just to hang out with others that look like me?"
—Mia, 41, CA
We want to hear YOUR stories about a moment in your life where the way race was playing into a friendship was really obvious. Write us an email, or record a voice memo, and send it to deathsexmoney@wnyc.org.

Listen to This: Audio We Love

If you've ever wanted to hear a podcast all about periods, may we suggest Feeling My Flo? It's aimed at teenagers, but there are great stories about the joys and complications of menstruating for people of all ages and all genders. The second episode traces three generations of the López family, and follows their period stories from the Dominican Republic in the 1950s to a "period party" here in the U.S. a few years ago. "It took me a while to really embrace my period," Vanessa López tells her now 20-year-old daughter, Aszana. "With the intention of the period party, I wanted you to get there before I did."

We aren't afraid to say it: We ♥️ Mister Rogers. And we also love the new podcast Finding Fred, about not just the man behind the sweaters, but about what his work can teach grown-ups about the world we're living in right now. Hosted by former Slate parenting columnist Carvell Wallace, the first episode digs into what it was about Mister Rogers's empathy that was so radical. "We think of the realm of feelings as not requiring work or clarity or discipline," Carvell says to guest Ashley C. Ford. Her response? "That's our problem."
Did you love what you heard from Scattered?

Good news: there's gonna be more where that came from.
Subscribe so you don't miss an episode!
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