View this email in your browser
Beautiful Questions logo
 A U G U S T   2 0 1 8   E D I T I O N

Can questions lead to love?

Psychologist Arthur Aron with love questions
I’ve written about the power of questions to spark innovation or improve communication between people. I’ve even talked about how asking questions can help us to achieve our goals at work or in our everyday lives.

But can questions cause people to fall in love?

That question has been the subject of decades of research by Arthur Aron of Stony Brook University (above), who I interviewed recently. Surprisingly, Aron has found that when two people ask each other a series of specific questions (36 of them, carefully crafted by Aron and fellow researchers), it can quickly strengthen the relationship between those two people—and may even foster romantic feelings.

Why do the questions have this effect? I asked Aron, and he told me that if questions are formulated and asked the right way, they can do a few key things. “First, just by asking, you’re showing that you care about the other person. Second, the question encourages that person to reveal something about themselves. And then that creates an opportunity for you to respond to what they are revealing.”

In short, questions show interest, create understanding, and build rapport. Those are three strong legs upon which a relationship can be built. For the full story, including a complete list Aron’s 36 questions (in case you want to try them out for yourself), click here»

Are you a beautiful questioner? To find out, ask yourself these 5 questions.

The Questionologist on
I recently started writing a new online column for Psychology Today called “The Questionologist.” In my first column, I shared a set of questions that can help you determine if you are a “beautiful questioner.”

Of course, it’s well-known that some of the best questioners in the world are young children. They tend to ask questions freely, without bias, and with great imagination. The challenge for adults who want to become better questioners is to release the inner 4-year-old—that fearless, curious questioner we all used to be. To do that, start by asking yourself:

* Am I willing to be seen as naïve?
* Am I comfortable raising questions with no immediate answers?
* Am I willing to move away from what I know?
* Am I open to admitting I might be wrong?
* Am I willing to slow down and consider?

For more about these five questions, read the complete column in Psychology Today, by clicking »

Coming soon:
The Book of Beautiful Questions

The Book of Beautiful Questions (cover) by Warren Berger
As some of you may know, I have a new questioning book coming out Oct. 30. Here’s a sneak peek at the book’s colorful cover. Bloomsbury, my publisher, tells me the gray background will be a metallic silver, which I'm curious to see in print.
So: Having already written A More Beautiful Question, why would I choose to write another book on the same subject? Mainly because I listened to readers of the first book, who told me they were looking for something more specific. A More Beautiful Question urged people to ask more questions. Which then caused people to ask: Okay, but what should we be asking?

This book is an attempt to answer that question. It’s divided into 4 specific areas: Decision-making, Creativity, Connecting with others, and Leadership.

Based on what I was hearing from people, these seemed to be the subject areas of greatest interest. In each of these areas, I share questions that can help you achieve better results.

Yes, it’s true: Asking questions can definitely enable you to 1) make better decisions, both professionally and in your everyday life; 2) come up with better ideas and bring them to fruition; 3) strengthen your relationships, at work and at home; and 4) be a more effective leader. But they must be the right questions—such as the 200-plus questions in this book. These questions—and the stories behind them—come from some of the world’s most creative thinkers and innovators. They’re “beautiful” (and effective) because they are designed to “shift your thinking” in some way—by encouraging you to challenge assumptions or break habits, to look at a problem or situation from a different angle, or to broaden the range of possibilities being considered.

You can find out more about the new book—including what smart people like Dan Pink and Adam Grant are saying about it—here »

Sprechen Sie Deutsche?

If so, I've got a freebie for you.

German edition of A More Beautiful Question -- free!

This is an unusual offer, but I happen to have a few extra copies of the German paperback edition of A More Beautiful Question. So if anybody out there reads German, or knows someone who reads German, let me know. I’ll send a free, signed copy of the book (titled Die Kunst Des Klugen Fragens) to the first five people who email me to ask for it. (Unfortunately I can only extend this offer to readers in the U.S., because I can’t afford to pick up the high postal cost of shipping books to another country.) Contact me at
Thank you, as always, for your interest in beautiful questions, and I hope to continue the conversation with you on Twitter, Facebook, and the website.
Copyright © 2018 A More Beautiful Question, All rights reserved.

Want to change how you receive these emails?
You can update your preferences or unsubscribe from this list.