How to Move Forward When You Feel Slammed
Resilience for Life November 2014 Newsletter
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Stuck in Overcare? How to Move Forward When You Feel Slammed

Madison BumgarnerIf you watched any of the World Series this year, you know what a nail-biter it was. Scores swung wildly from one win to the next. No sooner had the Royals started looking dominant, the Giants came back – only to get skunked. The wild gyrations continued until Game 7 when the Giants came back yet again to clinch their third Championship in 5 years.
In the midst of all the highs and the lows, it got me thinking about some of the work I do in helping people to master emotional regulation and learn resilience.
“Maybe I can play with my own emotional regulation,” I thought, “and see if I can watch from a non-judgmental perspective – still care and root for the Giants but not go down the proverbial rabbit hole.”
And you know what? It was hard! What I noticed is how easy it is to slide into the state of being what HeartMath founder Doc Childre calls “overcare.” It’s when care becomes stressful or depleting. We become less effective, anxious, overprotective, defensively righteous. We literally leak energy.

Overcare is the road to burnout.

But it’s not necessarily something to push away. Recognizing and appreciating overcare for what it is reveals much. The very fact it exists is a sign that our hearts want to practice true care and love...


compassion fatigue comic


New Life Story coach Jaymie Meyer

Learning from the Stories We Tell

On the blog this month, I share a couple anecdotes about clients overcoming “overcare” – care that becomes stressful or depleting – by accepting their stress as opportunities for change. As we head toward the holidays, all of us will likely face plenty of such opportunities on our own.
One thing that’s so useful about client stories: Not only do they give you specific models and guides; they can also spark ideas for dealing with our own specific situations. They can inspire us.
It's one reason why I was so honored to be among the New Life Story coaches asked to contribute to the ebook Successful Life Story Transformations: Using the ROADMAP System to Change Mind, Brain, and Behavior, now available from Amazon and other sellers.
Its vignettes illuminate the hidden agendas, beliefs, habits, and assumptions that ghostwrite limiting stories, along with the insight and mutual work that generated a new life story for each person.
Changing your mind changes your brain and your life.

Pecan Wild Rice and Goji Berry Pilaf

goji berriesThis is one of my favorite recipes from Dr. Mark Hyman’s book The Blood Sugar Solution Cookbook and will be gracing our table this Thanksgiving. Served with or without meat, it’s delicious!
Yes, goji berries can be expensive, but they’re also loaded with antioxidants. In fact, they’re the most nutrient dense fruit there is, containing all essential amino acids, 22 trace minerals and 6 vitamins. Economically, your best bet is to buy them in bulk at Whole Foods or other organic markets.
1 tbsp. extra virgin olive oil
1/2 c. leeks, diced
1 carrot, diced
2 stalks celery, diced
3/4 c. long grain brown rice
1/4 c. wild or wehani rice
Fresh herbs (rosemary and thyme suggested)
Pinch of sea salt
2 c. water
1/3 c. dried goji berries
1/3 c. pecans, chopped and roasted
Chopped fresh parsley for garnish
Heat the olive oil in a medium pot over medium heat, and lightly sauté the leeks, carrot and celery. Add the rice, herbs and salt, and stir to combine. Add the water and bring to a boil. Cover and reduce to a simmer for 30 minutes until the rice is tender.
When the rice is done, add the goji berries and pecans, fluff and serve with a sprinkle of fresh parsley.
Serves 4
Image by JimmyMac210

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